I get these dreams sometimes. The same thing happens every time. I am forced to move out of the place I am living, into an unfamiliar one that is usually not a very nice place. And in my dream, I am always trying to talk myself into liking this new change, even though my surroundings are dreadful. And every time, I wake up with the most tremendous sense of relief that it was just a dream, I could almost kiss the walls.
To say that I am a homebody would be a vast understatement. I spent most of my years growing up in a place where I never felt I belonged. When I finally let go of that place (never looked back, really) and moved to the island, I finally found my place. And I vowed to myself, never to leave.
Well. I spent the last week or so in the complicated world of real estate. I discovered a perfect little house. Off the island. And all week, despite the fact that that house was calling my name for a number of reasons, I was ignoring the distress calls inside my heart. I have let that little house go as well. I just can't bear the thought of leaving.
A few weeks ago, I was in Tofino. My favourite place on this lovely little planet we call home. When I'm not there, I long to be there. And each time I walk the beaches, little stories unfold before me. Sometimes mysterious ones...
And this car. How did it get here? The tires are still inflated, so my guess is that it might have travelled all the way from Japan and has washed in with the tides. We are starting to see a lot of debris from the tsunami on our beaches, so that would be the most reasonable explanation, right? But maybe it has a different story? I'll never know.
And this was just pure whimsy. It's not everyday you see a pole weaved from head to toe in coloured bits of fabric. It was like a maypole of sorts. Beautiful and mysterious. I envision a great celebration. Or perhaps an offering to the sea gods...
Or sea fairies?
All I know is that the sea and its creatures were offering up a lot of love this day. How lucky they are to be able to make their homes right on the beach. These tiny sand huts were popping up all over the beach... no bigger than a thimble. Adorable.
And this house? This one would be mine, tucked snuggly amongst the trees on its very own island at high tide. What a lovely place to dream away the summers, and to watch the storms in the winters. And if you think it might be lonely, there are two other houses hidden on this tiny island.
The future is never certain, but my heart is telling me to stay. And just as though I have awakened from yet another dream, my relief is abundant enough that I could kiss the sand.
so beautiful - takes my breath away. such glorious scenery, such love lingering on the beach. I am utterly enchanted.
ReplyDeleteI am thinking you will see lots of garbage wash up on the shore from Japan over time huh? So sad.
ReplyDeleteIn less than 4 weeks hubby and I will be in Victoria. I am wondering if you can recommend 'must sees'! We have Butchart Gardens on the list of course and all the tourist type spots. Anything you would recommend that is 'off the beaten path'? Perhaps we can meet for a coffee/tea? :)
xo Catherine
Where is this place? It is so beautiful!
ReplyDeleteChange is never easy but you know deep down inside of you when something just isn't right. If you have that strong a reaction I say you made the right decision. I remember my husband (partner at the time) and I were in the final throws of renting a new apartment when I suddenly started sweating and shaking uncontrollably and just couldn't go through with it. Turns out the guy who'd lived there had died. He didn't actually die at home but had been ill and bed bound for a long time and the stains I'd noticed on the carpet had been from his feeding tube. I always listen to those feelings no matter how bizarre they may seem to others.
ReplyDeletewhat an amazing sight you just filled my senses with....so incredibly gorgeous.....well, maybe not the car.....
ReplyDeletethe beach is where my heart wants to be, but it probably won't ever live there full time...so when my toes touch the sand, i let it fill me up over and over again, so i can always reach in and take what i need on any given day......
xoxo
jaime - this touched me right in the heart. i stay where i am and question it constantly. and then . . . the crazy neighbor stops by with crazy stories and we laugh and laugh and laugh; he scares the newest neighbors, but for those of us who have been here a while, he is part of the charm.
ReplyDeletewhen and if it is ever time to go, you will know. i almost said it would be love at first sight with another magical place, but no - it may not be. i've had it both ways.
and that house on the island? oh my my.
xoxo
Oh, peaceful beauty...sigh. Listen to your heart ♥ never leave, all will be right.
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you listened to your heart, Jaime! Someday you'll find the perfect little house on your island. Love the beauty you've found on the beach! xo
ReplyDeleteOh Jaimie I love this post but then when I do get time to drop by you always have such gorgeous pictures that invoke such incredible peace and calmness. They are a balm to my soul.
ReplyDeletei feel like we just took a long walk on the beach together talking about our last few months :) thanks for sharing so many comments. it was great to come back over here and find not one but TWO posts ~ yea!
ReplyDeletefor me feeling at home is tricky, in the past 15 years it's been fleeting moments of 'home' rather than a place. i long for the place, i'm lucky enough to have found the partner ( 10 yrs ago ) but to find the home and the partner together has been a bumpy road.
thanks for sharing your pieces of home :)
Awesome!
ReplyDeleteThis? This is your home?
ReplyDeleteI'd never leave either.
I don't believe you'll go wrong following your heart. How could you?
I wrote a very long comment about this but somehow it disappeared when I published it. I was so flustered by this that I couldnt even remember what I had typed enough to even bother writing anything again except for how flustered I was. Guess it wasnt meant to be heard!
ReplyDelete